End of a year, end of a decade?

Some people say this year marks the end of a decade, some say no, it was the beginning of the millennium's second decade. I'll have to come down on the former side: a decade has ten years, and by any reasonable standard, this decade officially began with 2001 and ends tonight. At any rate, there are plenty of reasons for being reflective right now. I can scarcely even deal with trying to look back at the last ten years...way too much happened. But this past year? Sure, I'll give that a shot. The year began with me continuing to get attention from "Up In The Air," including more interviews in the media and more opportunities. The film kept opening in new countries around the world, and someone always mentioned my song at some point. It was simply amazing. The biggest adventure of the year was in March, when Ted Moniak and I were privileged enough to go to Tokyo to help promote the film in Japan with actress Anna Kendrick. I loved every minute of the trip, and I completely fell in love with Japan. I'll never forget how well I was treated, how intelligent and attentive the members of the press and radio were over there, and how quickly fans found out about me, showing up at my hotel to get autographs and pictures. What an experience! Ted and I also went to Dallas the very next month to perform at the C.R. Smith Museum for "AA Administrative Professionals Day." For both these events I am grateful to Paramount Pictures and American Airlines; everyone I met from these organizations was courteous and respectful.

Throughout the winter I worked on my very first CD at a basement studio run by Mike Martin. I learned so much about the recording process, and had a blast playing with Ned Watson, Ted, Larry Perlmutter and other musicians on the songs. A highlight was spending time at Keysor School, my old elementary school, with the kids who sang with me on "Read A Book." All four of them were wonderful, as was their music teacher, Tracy StClair. My CD, "Close To Something Beautiful," was officially released in April, one year after my mom passed away. And of course, a major part of the year I was in a continuing state of grief over having lost my mom the previous year, and spending the final months with my dad at Bethesda. He had gone into sharp decline this year and finally passed away in July. I miss my parents more than any words can say. My next album will be a tribute to my mother, and a photograph taken by my dad will grace the cover of the ambient side project I recorded with John Sobocan, to be released in January at last. It's hard these days whenever something good happens, knowing that I don't get to share it with Mom and Dad. But at least they both got to hear me sing before they passed.

Good friends enabled me to meet some of my challenges this year: I owe special thanks to Ted Moniak, Leslie Elpers, Gretchen Hewitt, Annalise Raziq, Melinda Farrar and others for the many ways they helped. New musical friends from Greenville, Illinois, proved to be wonderful additions to my journey, and I have the utmost fondness and respect for Dale Hanabarger, Erin O'Toole, Craig Baumberger and several others for inviting me to play at shows in Greenville, and facilitating some new opportunities. Dale joined me for the successful Neil Young tribute at Off Broadway in November, which was one of the most fun shows I've ever had. Special thanks also go to new friends Ryan Kirby and Chrissy Renick, both very talented singer/songwriters that I was proud to share the stage with for several gigs, and I look forward to doing that again with both of them. Ned Watson and Kathy Pour were loyal and flexible as always, and each had changes in their lives that impacted them, but they always made the gigs. John Sobocan, my collaborator from Canada, made several fateful visits to St. Louis, and helped me assemble a live CD from a gig at The Grove Deli recorded last year. Mr. Moniak, of course, was the big story, getting a job at St. Louis Strings and moving in with me in June, a pivotal event that allowed many things to go more smoothly, not the least of which was rehearsing new songs right away, and being able to perform either as a duo, trio or full band, depending on the nature of the gig. Thank you, Ted...wish I had some special award to give you, but hopefully my gratitude will suffice for now!

In the last quarter of the year, there were so many remarkable surprises: getting together with Jeff Viers, who invited Ted and me to join a "Mastermind" affirmation and goal-setting group that has been enormously beneficial; communicating with Christa Juergens for the first time (see previous blog) and finding common ground so creatively fertile that we've finished writing two songs together that I'm truly excited about; reuniting with childhood friends Rick and Mary K Haegg in Springfield in September and sharing a stage with Rick (who plays guitar), thanks to the wonderful opening slot made possible by my friends Brian Capps and Steve Newman, and the booking savvy of Liesl Aldridge. A special friend from France, Katherine (Renaud) Tardivel, also tracked me down at Facebook and we were able to catch up with each other after about 30 years of trying to find each other again. And, through it all, I evolved as a musician and songwriter, learning more and more about my abilities and passion for this craft of music. It hasn't been an easy year by any means. I'm haunted by the loss of my parents, I've had other painful losses I don't want to go into, and my working situation is very unpredictable and challenging. This path I've chosen has its ups and definite downs. But I am so grateful to be making music, and the new year begins with sessions for my next CD already under way, an article in Empire Magazine's January issue now published, and opportunities on many fronts opening up, aided by good energy from my manager Robynn Ragland  and new publicist Ben Flug. Despite some difficult times, I genuinely look forward to 2011, and I am determined to keep working to bring the magic and wonder into my life, like the best moments of this past year. My life is certainly interesting these days, and I love being surprised. Bring 'em on, 2011! I can't wait!

A rather skewed Christmas this year

It's been a long time since I updated this blog. For that matter, it's been a long time since I've known anything close to normalcy. When you get a song in a hit movie and lose your parents in the span of 18 months, life isn't going to be the same anymore. It's a very difficult holiday season. I'm not truly in a Christmas-y mood, and I miss Mom and Dad like crazy. Right about now, Mom would be baking her many famous cookies in huge batches, cheerfully preparing packages to give to people. Dad would've already gotten the tree up, with slightly tangled strings of lights and the same ornaments we used for years. Classical music would be playing constantly at their house, and my parents would be waiting to see what visitors they'd have this year. Well, there won't be any at the house anymore. It's been sold, and they are in heaven now, whatever that means. I am in a house with a great roommate, something that has allowed me to keep feeling at least the semblance of security and basic comfort. I have wonderful friends, and they all know how I am struggling to overcome the grief about my parents. Meanwhile, on the music front, I continue to be active and optimistic. Had what is probably my best gig ever at The Grove Deli, a wonderful show in which billing was shared by my friend Gretchen Hewitt, with a beautiful, electrifyin' crowd of fans and supporters. I have written alot of cool new songs. Startling, unexpected things have happened, such as becoming friends with Christa Juergens, the girl I had a mad crush on in seventh grade but never could talk to. All these years later, not only are we friends but we've co-written two songs together! It blows my mind. Every one of my friends, both those involved in my music and those who aren't, has given me something to feel grateful about. And I'm starting my second CD, the one about my mom and loss and the power of friendship, right now as you're reading this. Is Christmas different for me this year? Yes, in every way. Do I dread it? Yes. But I am not losing sight of the wonder of my life, the opportunities I have, and the people I cherish. For that, I am grateful, and I truly wish EVERYONE out there a Merry, safe Christmas.